Author Topic: Daily starters  (Read 237563 times)

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #525 on: July 13, 2016, 06:58:05 AM »
I had amnesia once - well, maybe twice.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #526 on: July 14, 2016, 06:41:10 AM »
I get plenty of exercise - jumping to conclusions, pushing my luck, and dodging deadlines.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #527 on: July 15, 2016, 08:25:02 AM »
A friend is like a book: you don't need to read all of them, just pick the best ones
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #528 on: July 16, 2016, 10:45:05 AM »
...
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #529 on: July 17, 2016, 05:37:42 AM »
A liberal is just a conservative that hasn't been mugged yet.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #530 on: July 18, 2016, 09:18:32 AM »
Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #531 on: July 19, 2016, 07:15:31 AM »
My grandma told me her joints are getting weaker, so I told her to roll them tighter.... ;)
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #532 on: July 20, 2016, 08:55:37 AM »
You're the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #533 on: July 21, 2016, 09:28:59 AM »
How many times do I have to flush before you go away?
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #534 on: July 22, 2016, 08:11:52 AM »
The hardest part of any relationship is when it's not your turn to talk.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #535 on: July 23, 2016, 07:40:59 AM »
Most people dream of not working and having lots of money. During an economic crisis 50 % of those dreams come true....
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #536 on: July 24, 2016, 07:49:11 AM »
Occasionally, a true friend gives his paw not his hand...
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #537 on: July 25, 2016, 06:58:41 AM »
I love what you've done with your hair. How do you get it to come out of the nostrils like that?  :(|)
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #538 on: July 27, 2016, 08:51:33 AM »
What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common? You don't look down.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #539 on: July 28, 2016, 07:46:26 AM »
Never laugh at your girlfriends choices... your one of them!
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