Author Topic: Daily starters (Read 303632 times)

Kingman · « **Reply #495 on:** June 12, 2016, 05:50:03 AM »

You're never too old to learn something stupid.

Kingman · « **Reply #496 on:** June 13, 2016, 08:23:45 AM »

Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.

Kingman · « **Reply #497 on:** June 14, 2016, 08:22:19 AM »

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

Kingman · « **Reply #498 on:** June 15, 2016, 10:56:33 AM »

I like two kinds of women: domestic and imported.

Kingman · « **Reply #499 on:** June 16, 2016, 06:03:48 PM »

Don't forget that alcohol helps to remove the stress, the bra, the panties and many other problems.

Kingman · « **Reply #500 on:** June 17, 2016, 07:59:13 AM »

What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? Artificial intelligence.

Kingman · « **Reply #501 on:** June 18, 2016, 08:01:02 AM »

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Kingman · « **Reply #502 on:** June 19, 2016, 06:21:37 AM »

Being a great father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow.

Jim Pittsburgh · « **Reply #503 on:** June 19, 2016, 09:30:05 AM »

nice!

Kingman · « **Reply #504 on:** June 26, 2016, 07:01:11 AM »

Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds? Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.

Kingman · « **Reply #505 on:** June 27, 2016, 04:12:23 PM »

I always tell new hires, don't think of me as your boss, think of me as your friend who can fire you.

Kingman · « **Reply #506 on:** June 28, 2016, 06:13:25 AM »

Smartphones are pacifiers for adults.

OldiesButGoodies · « **Reply #507 on:** June 28, 2016, 03:19:36 PM »

funny and accurate

Kingman · « **Reply #508 on:** June 29, 2016, 07:25:53 AM »

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

Kingman · « **Reply #509 on:** June 30, 2016, 12:45:45 PM »

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

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