Author Topic: Daily starters (Read 303770 times)

Kingman · « **Reply #660 on:** November 05, 2017, 08:48:52 AM »

You have two parts of your brain, 'left' and 'right'. In the left side, there's nothing right. In the right side, there's nothing left.

Kingman · « **Reply #661 on:** November 06, 2017, 06:54:26 AM »

I walked past a homeless guy with a sign that read, "One day, this could be you." So I put my money back in my pocket, just in case he's right. $:-\$

Kingman · « **Reply #662 on:** November 08, 2017, 06:16:15 AM »

I'm single by choice. Unfortunately, it's not my choice.

Kingman · « **Reply #663 on:** November 09, 2017, 06:29:16 AM »

Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.

Kingman · « **Reply #664 on:** November 12, 2017, 08:04:51 AM »

I never knew the meaning of true happiness until I got married, but then it was too late...

Kingman · « **Reply #665 on:** November 13, 2017, 06:23:49 AM »

A healthy sleep not only makes your life longer, but also shortens the workday.

Kingman · « **Reply #666 on:** November 14, 2017, 06:45:52 AM »

Clinging on to past and living is like driving forward while watching the rear view mirror...

Kingman · « **Reply #667 on:** November 18, 2017, 10:50:24 AM »

Relax...It's just a bad day, not a bad life.

Kingman · « **Reply #668 on:** November 19, 2017, 06:31:12 AM »

I think this generation will have to go into separate rooms and text each other to work out their problems.

Kingman · « **Reply #669 on:** November 21, 2017, 06:38:49 AM »

That awkward moment when you leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is "act natural, you're innocent".

Jim Pittsburgh · « **Reply #670 on:** November 21, 2017, 07:45:20 AM »

that's good!

Kingman · « **Reply #671 on:** November 22, 2017, 06:15:16 PM »

The Thanksgiving holiday brings Black Friday... Americans of all races and religions gather together to fight over discounted electronics.

Kingman · « **Reply #672 on:** November 25, 2017, 06:32:42 AM »

Smoking will kill you... Bacon will kill you... But,smoking bacon will cure it!!!

Kingman · « **Reply #673 on:** November 27, 2017, 12:46:33 PM »

You can't help everyone, but everyone can help someone.

Kingman · « **Reply #674 on:** November 28, 2017, 08:10:15 AM »

My doctor told me I needed to break a sweat once a day so I started lying to my wife.

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