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Author Topic: Daily starters  (Read 303766 times)

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #630 on: January 12, 2017, 08:44:56 AM »
I hate double standards, unless they are in my favor.  ;D
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #631 on: January 15, 2017, 07:46:34 AM »
My blind date didn’t see anything in me...
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #632 on: January 16, 2017, 08:44:26 AM »
I can't figure out why I did not get excepted to college.... ???
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #633 on: January 17, 2017, 06:34:43 AM »
You never know if a man with an eye patch is winking at you or just blinking.  ;)
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #634 on: January 19, 2017, 06:23:37 AM »
I stayed up all night trying to remember if I have insomnia or amnesia...
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #635 on: January 21, 2017, 08:22:08 AM »
Sign in restaurant..."Low cut blouses will be looked down upon in this establishment."
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #636 on: February 26, 2017, 04:28:59 PM »
I have a few jokes about unemployed people but it doesn't matter none of them work.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #637 on: March 04, 2017, 06:25:58 PM »
A wise man once said... Nothing, he only listened.  ;D
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Offline Jim Pittsburgh

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #638 on: March 05, 2017, 08:50:50 AM »
excellent.... and welcome back.
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a bunch of nice sounding stuff. Nice that I'm finally able to actually listen to file music for the first time...

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #639 on: March 05, 2017, 02:27:01 PM »
Quote from: Jim Pittsburgh on March 05, 2017, 08:50:50 AM
excellent.... and welcome back.
Thanks Jim...been busy lately...

You'll never have a successful relationship with a woman if you can't tell the difference between a smile and a warning.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #640 on: March 10, 2017, 08:35:38 AM »
Got a case for my iPhone even though the screen is already cracked. So basically it's like putting a condom on my kid's head.
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Offline papabearjew

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #641 on: March 10, 2017, 10:31:55 PM »
Quote from: Kingman on March 10, 2017, 08:35:38 AM
Got a case for my iPhone even though the screen is already cracked. So basically it's like putting a condom on my kid's head.

If your kid then exhales through his nose...
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #642 on: March 11, 2017, 08:08:47 AM »
Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun a lot more work.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #643 on: March 13, 2017, 05:06:38 PM »
200 lbs on Earth is only 74 lbs on Mars. I'm not fat, I'm just on the wrong planet.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #644 on: March 22, 2017, 04:57:21 PM »
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
 Because those men already have boyfriends.  ;)   
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
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