Author Topic: Daily starters  (Read 303224 times)

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #150 on: July 11, 2012, 06:03:42 AM »
I have reached the age where I am stuck between everything annoys the crap out of me and I really don't give a shit.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #151 on: July 12, 2012, 05:37:31 AM »

If everything seems to be coming your way, you're probably in the wrong lane.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #152 on: July 13, 2012, 06:17:37 AM »

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #153 on: July 19, 2012, 05:47:23 AM »

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #154 on: July 20, 2012, 06:37:42 AM »

You know, they got a luggage store in the airport? A place to buy a piece of luggage? How late do you have to be for a flight where you're like, 'f**k it - just grab a pile of shit. We'll get a bag at the airport'.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #155 on: July 21, 2012, 09:28:49 AM »

The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #156 on: July 22, 2012, 06:02:03 AM »

Foreign Aid: The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #157 on: July 23, 2012, 05:38:16 AM »

Sometimes the best helping hand you can give is a good, firm push.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #158 on: July 24, 2012, 06:22:05 AM »

Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #159 on: July 25, 2012, 05:42:30 AM »

I sometimes go to my own little world, but that's okay, they know me there.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #160 on: July 26, 2012, 05:51:20 AM »

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: Fear of long words...
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #161 on: July 27, 2012, 05:43:31 AM »

Ham and Eggs: A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #162 on: July 28, 2012, 07:00:17 AM »

I had the right to remain silent, but I didn't have the ability.
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Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #163 on: July 29, 2012, 06:55:13 AM »

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!

Offline Kingman

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Re: Daily starters
« Reply #164 on: July 30, 2012, 05:54:42 AM »

My drinking team has a bowling problem.
IN REALITY IT ONLY MATTERS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE TO YOU!!!!!